Good Wife, Good Life. Biblical Ponderings

Many of you may have great spouses. If you are yet to have a spouse or yet to have a spouse, keep reading. Knowing that God gives us exceedingly above and more than we ask or desire, you can be certain that you will be in the pathway to that coming to pass. If, like me, you already have a good spouse, you can keep thanking the Lord for that and desire that it stays that way. 

A wise woman discerns and builds her home with words, deeds, and actions. When it is not required to speak, she chooses to close her lips. With love, affection, and forgiveness, she builds the family. The need to have a wise, understanding, and prudent wife is best expressed in these two verses. House and riches are the inheritance from fathers, but a wise, understanding, and prudent wife is from the Lord. (Proverbs 19:14 Version AMPC) . Every wise woman builds her house, but the foolish one tears it down with her own hands. (Proverbs 14:1 Bible Version AMPC) 

The remaining verses cited below in blue are from Proverbs 31. 30 years ago, much before my marriage, I desired a wife who was fervent in prayer, loved business and enjoyed driving. I have seen God’s faithfulness over and above, beyond all expectations. Three decades ago, families in the state that I hail from were steady government jobs were what parents of girls looked for in an arranged marriage. 

She keeps herself fit. She eats well and exercises well. She is fit physically as well as spiritually. She evaluates and measures the products and gains from her work. She is a great manager. She is early to work. She knows that the most important strength is spiritual strength. Her prayerfulness ensures she is always strong in all seasons, even when there is trouble or tests. She delegates specific activities to her maid. She visits each and every nook and corner of her garden and her home, inspecting. Even when it’s the weekend, holidays or even when she is unwell, she manages and plans everything. She is never idle.  These verses are from Proverbs 31. 17 She girds herself with strength [spiritual, mental, and physical fitness for her God-given task] and makes her arms strong and firm. 18 She tastes and sees that her gain from work [with and for God] is good; her lamp goes not out, but it burns on continually through the night [of trouble, privation, or sorrow, warning away fear, doubt, and distrust].15 She rises while it is yet night and gets [spiritual] food for her household and assigns her maids their tasks. 27 She looks well to how things go in her household, and the bread of idleness (gossip, discontent, and self-pity) she will not eat.

As a good wife, she is industrious in many ways. She is hardworking. She knows how to knit wool and stitch. From her earnings, she buys a field. She plants fruit and vegetable gardens. These verses are from Proverbs 31. 13 She seeks out wool and flax and works with willing hands [to develop it]. 19 She lays her hands to the spindle, and her hands hold the distaff. 16 She considers a [new] field before she buys or accepts it [expanding prudently and not courting neglect of her present duties by assuming other duties]; with her savings [of time and strength] she plants fruitful vines in her vineyard.

The husband trusts her totally. She is sometimes like the holy spirit in showing forth some attributes like comforting and counseling. Her husband is respected because of the household he manages in which she plays a great role in contributing to it. These are a few verses from Proverbs 31.  11 The heart of her husband trusts in her confidently and relies on and believes in her securely, so that he has no lack of [honest] gain or need of [dishonest] spoil. 12 She comforts, encourages, and does him only good as long as there is life within her.23 Her husband is known in the [city’s] gates, when he sits among the elders of the land.

Her children are disciplined. They call their mother “blessed.” Her husband is joyful and thankful to the Lord because of her. From time to time, he reminds his children how fortunate they are with the Lord’s blessing through their mom! 28 Her children rise up and call her blessed (happy, fortunate, and to be envied); and her husband boasts of and praises her, [saying], 29 Many daughters have done virtuously, nobly, and well [with the strength of character that is steadfast in goodness], but you excel them all.

She gives the very best food, organic, healthy, nutritous, that is far, far superior to any other restaurant or eating joint in the country. She checks out the various local markets, food from the nations of the world, online and retail stores, and judiciously buys fruits and vegetables. As per season, she changes fruits and vegetables so that a wide range of goodness from the Lords’ bountiful gardens across the world reaches homes. Organic ginger from Peru, King coconuts from Sri Lanka, organic grapes from South Africa, papayas from India, and great fleshy medjool dates from Morocco. She has the best recipe books and makes the most trendy and tasty cakes, cakes that are sweet to  taste with natural sweeteners and no sugar, and great dishes for dinner and breakfast. She does not leave a single stone unturned in making the family table in the kitchen a banqueting table with the choicest food. This verse is from proverbs 31. 14 She is like the merchant ships loaded with foodstuffs; she brings her household’s food from a far [country].

She knows herbal remedies and home remedies. Her kitchen garden has all the miracle herbs, from Adalaodakam to Rosemary. All sicknesses, from plagues like COVID to flues, have a remedy with which she is ready to protect her family. She trusts in the Lord, she fears Him and loves Him much. She is so confident that her Lord and saviour will never leave her or forsake her.  21 She fears not the snow for her family, for all her household are doubly clothed in scarlet.25 Strength and dignity are her clothing and her position is strong and secure; she rejoices over the future [the latter day or time to come, knowing that she and her family are in readiness for it]! 30 Charm and grace are deceptive, and beauty is vain [because it is not lasting], but a woman who reverently and worshipfully fears the Lord, she shall be praised!

She knows interior decor and design and even landscaping. She makes all things beautiful with cost effective purchases from the best retail outlets. 22 She makes for herself coverlets, cushions, and rugs of tapestry. Her clothing is of linen, pure and fine, and of purple [such as that of which the clothing of the priests and the hallowed cloths of the temple were made]. 24 She makes fine linen garments and leads others to buy them; she delivers to the merchants girdles [or sashes that free one up for service].

She is generous to all in need, even giving gold and wedding garments to maids. She guides the people around her with wisdom in all matters – family to health to savings and matters of education. 20 She opens her hand to the poor, yes, she reaches out her filled hands to the needy [whether in body, mind, or spirit].26 She opens her mouth in skillful and godly Wisdom, and on her tongue is the law of kindness [giving counsel and instruction]. 

I would like to challenge you. Prayerfully write down the attributes you want in a wife. Use verses which the Holy Spirit quickens you with, like the verses above or any other portion of the Bible. As you keep remembering these, you will experience the faithfulness of God. Each and every desire comes to life, exceedingly and abundantly more than you ask or desire. 

If you want a husband, dive deep into the Bible, find out the qualities of a person that you would desire. Write them, revise them, and finally, the holy spirit will guide you to the qualities in a husband that would complement you, be suitable for you.